#2 Death has a Stroke Pt 1

[The Wonderful Wachter]

Ultimate Brave and the Bold #2
Death Has a Stroke Pt 1
Lights, Camera, Batwoman!!!

Seigelville, Texas
Blue Gold Media Building

The dull, meaty thumps echoed about the BatB gym, two titans clashing in the middle of the square ring, putting on a show for those with nothing to do in their cubicles. The legendary champion versus the inexperienced rookie. The older man had swept the younger off his feet time and time again yet the latter did not seem to be tiring of picking himself up from the mat. They’d go at it again then again, neither one exhausted despite the hours of practice. The bruises they must have. The hunger they must feel. It made Linda weary just looking at them.

To her untrained eye, she could see Teddy Grant – pretty much a public secret that he was the hero Wildcat, it was all over the blogs – holding back, going easy on the beginner. He had left many, many openings for Kaldur to notice and then follow through on, only to find himself on the flat of his back… Or compromised in some other position such as having a limb impossibly bent. Eventually, after forever, the young hero started looking for what he could not see, the openings Teddy hid. And every so often, she pushed a button on the computer to switch cameras.

It wasn’t quite boring, and certainly better intern work than bringing Mr. Kord coffee, but after the third hour. . . She sighed and switched the camera angle again to show the satisfied look on Teddy’s face as his approval grew.

“Good. Good, Kaldur. That’s it,” he blocked a punch with his forearm, deflected really. Kaldur kept at it, swinging forth another punch to keep the older man on the defensive. “Need more than that, son. I don’t tire easily. At least not without a six pack in my hand. Come on. I know you can do it!”

Another camera shift, it focused in on the tiny bead of sweat dripping from Kaldur’s dark skin. She now had quite the level of clearance. Of course, she’d never be able to properly speak about it else her great, great grandchildren would still be paying legal fees. She had figured out, over the weeks, the identities of three of the Brave and Bold heroes. Unfortunately, two of them were the twins so really, Linda’s extra work hadn’t made it so that she was likely to blab any secrets.

Kaldur grunted, ducking a blow.

He had been the one she figured out. It wasn’t quite that easy. Though Alpha Inc put quite the effort into to making it appear like he was some undersea being come to save the surface, it was obvious if you paid attention, who he was. The gills and webbed fingers were fake yet the hair was real. His eyes were even more piercing out of hero-mode. And, funny enough, he wore more a mask in his civvies. The dreadlocks were almost too much and what kept her from realizing he truly wasn’t the Little Mermaid’s cousin for nearly three weeks.

Camera shift. Teddy hit spittle out of Kaldur’s mouth.

Cheshire was impossible. That silky seductive voice and mask always stayed on yet based on her skintone, Linda thought she had a bead on ethnicity. As for Batwoman. There were three viable options and she fully expected to have it narrowed down to only two by the time the heroine’s spread was released. That left only Blue Beetle. Odds were in favor of Mr. Kord… however, Linda and many others on the production staff had been at his side watching the heroes save the day. Even when Beetle was there.

”Damn it, gillface! HIT ME!!” bellowed Teddy in a fury, causing Linda to almost fall out of her chair in surprise.

“I’m sorry,” Kaldur aimed two more pathetic kicks at the older man’s side.

”Don’t be sorry! Strike or so help me god I’ll grab one of your waterbearers and shove it so far up y—“

Before Linda could think to reach for the censor key, a whumf sounded and the entire gym shook about her. At first her eyes stared disbelieving at the monitor. Surely that was impossible. Then she looked up to see a Wildcat-sized hole through solid concrete.

Kaldur leapt over the ropes at the same time Linda ordered the cameras to get closer while simultaneously running to help the aging hero.

He was covered in chunks of the wall, a bit of blood on his lips, yet… the blood was not alone. A smile, a huge face cracking grin, stretched from ear to ear. Insanity. The man had been punched through the ropes of the ring and reinforced stone and he was HAPPY?!?

“I’m so—“ Kaldur started. “I mean, apologies.” Linda didn’t bother to smirk at catching him drop the humble hero act then hasten to put it back on. Both went to work cleaning Teddy off as a medical team rushed from the other side of the hole.

Wildcat waved them all back. “It’s fine, it’s fine. This is nothing.” He coughed up more blood and his eyes lolled back into his head for a second. “You still have a bit more of training left.”

“Surely you are mistaken,” soft, gravely voice of the Waterbearer to the rescue. “How am I supposed to train with you in this condition?”

“Ah, you don’t need me.” Blood, blood, blood. Linda was going to pass out before he did. “Use Petals there. Practice your cradling the baby like I showed you.”

Linda looked appalled. “N-no. I can’t.”

“Of course you can. You applied for the position. What did you think you’d do, get us treats and hit a few buttons?” he shooed them towards the ring, his right hand twisted in the wrong direction. “Now go. I’m gonna see about getting me a nice dose of pain killers.”

Kaldur held out a hand for Linda to take. “Shall we?”

The young woman suddenly felt like a scared little girl. Her eyes traveled over his glistening muscles, his lean form stretching the red top so much like his costume’s enticingly to her eyes. Scared girl transformed into heady teenager when her eyes met his, their piercing gaze saying he would not let any harm come to her.

“O-okay.” She mumbled.

It was only then she remembered what cradle the baby was. And an instant later, she remembered she had on a skirt today.

For the next hour, her screams filled the internet as Kaldur tossed her high into the air and then caught her deftly between his two firm arms, never once dropping her. Never once leaving a bruise.

~~~

One might find it difficult to believe that the two people standing alone in one of Ted Kord’s luxurious rooms he provided to visiting owners, investors, and reporters were related. One was a tall, statuesque woman with her red hair cut brutally short. She had her sinewy arms crossed across her chest, beautiful features twisted in fury. One could just barely make out the sweat stains on her beige tanktop. The other was a man, her equal in height, but in no other forms. His dark hair receded into a widow’s peak, a mustache providing his impeccable suit a sense of class and style lost to this day and age.

“And I’m telling you that no is not an option.” He lit a cigar, relishing in its scent.

Robert Kane found himself relatively unchanged since the incident with Doctor Cyber. The only true difference in his outlook of life and business – in his mind, they were the same thing – being that he needed to spend a tad more money in personal defense and Kane Industries had to corner the market on armament against these new freaks. To that extent, he had agreed to that arrogant Kord’s venture and even enlisted the aid of his own flesh and blood.

“I don’t care. I refuse.” His niece shook her head profusely. “I didn’t agree to doing that. I just want to help people.”

“You are helping people, sweetie,” he smiled and laid a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “But surely you should have expected this. After all, Maxim is one of your sponsors.” There wasn’t really any comfort behind the gesture. It was said the only way to get Robert to truly express his feelings was to see him watch his daughter at her tennis matches or show him his ex-wife humiliated on TMZ.

“How am I supposed to strike fear into the hearts of criminals after… after they see me…” It was too much for her, she couldn’t finish the thought. Her temper, always a problem, was rising.

Her shoulder was squeezed before Robert walked around to settle into a formfitting chair he needed to get for his offices in Gotham and San Fran. “Kitty,” he began, using a pet name from ages ago, “you will do this.”

Kate said nothing.

“I was there for you after the loss of your mother and sister. I took you in when your father choose his career in the military to be more important than looking after you. I encouraged you when you enlisted instead of going to college like I wanted of you, knowing full well you did it for the wrong reasons. And when you were dishonorably discharged, I was once again by your side, picking you up when you were down. My foolish brother may have abandoned you, as he did the rest of our family, but I did not.”

His voice was silky smooth, always emphasizing on “I.” He could see her face twitch with conflicted emotions.

“I gave you a job when no one else would,” not that you need it, he mentally added, but she had always been a hard worker. “One that lets you continue to serve the people in your own unique Kane way, making the symbol of the bat proud.” In reality, Kate was selected because Robert knew he could trust her… And she was the perfect guinea pig for the field testing of their latest weaponry. Thank God for deep psychological issues stemming from childhood trauma.

She bit her lip.

“You’ve done our family crest justice. You carry out justice.” His smile never reached his eyes. “You’ve made me so happy.” Happy that you’re at the top of the poles… “But now, you have to serve the family, and the company, in another way. You have to do the photo-shoot.”

“Why?” It didn’t come out as a whine. To her, it was a perfectly logical question and why he had to fly in specifically to order her to.

“Your heroics doesn’t pay for itself.”

“No shit but I have the funds. I don’t need the sponsor.”

“Sweetie,” he sighed, letting his paunchy gut expand slightly. “If I let you do that, you’d be bankrupt by the end of the year.”

Kate started pacing, her long legs carrying her back and forth in only 16 steps as she considered his reasoning. He was right of course. And she’d still have her mask on or, well, a mask on. Nobody would know it was her. Besides, she was in the public light anyways, her every hero move caught on film. Not like being in the shadows really meant something to her. The worst that could happen was some thug would bring the subject up as an insult and she’d break his nose… possibly his leg… and suffer the fine.

“You win.” She gave in, her arms still crossed. “But a call could have sufficed. You didn’t need to fly out here just to convince me.”

“Oh you know me and my busy schedule. I’ll take every excuse I can get in order to see my beautiful niece.” Once again, he didn’t add that he’d also take every excuse he could get to try and convince Danni Garrett switch companies.

A beep on Kate’s wrist saved both Kanes from any further awkward family moments. She clicked to answer and the mechanical voice of Skeets came through.

”Hero down. All Brave and the Bold members are to suit up and head to his aid immediately.”

“Go, go. Be careful,” he needn’t have said so. She was already out the door.

[The Wonderful Wachter]

Bounce. Whack. Bounce. Booster didn’t quite care for racquetball, certainly was nowhere near as fun as football but at least it was a way to kill time before it was their turn to patrol. Ted was at his side, swatting the ball with quite the amount of skill. The man from the future couldn’t recall a single other Blue Beetle who had done this recreationally. Maybe as part of some elaborate trap made by the Mad Hatter mixed with Sportsmaster but not simply for fun and exercise.

Sweat dripped down Booster’s brow. Ted liked to change things up. And since he was technically Booster’s boss, Booster had to follow any training regimen the sadistic Wildcat and Ted came up with. Never thought he’d miss the days of Bats’ impossibly hard hologram training missions.

“Who do the odds favor this week, Skeets?” Ted wasn’t breathing hard. Not even grunting.

“Batwoman, sir,” their official score keeper answered promptly.

Beetle made a sour face. “Batwoman? I’m just as normal as Kate. No powers here. Just training and tech yet… Batwoman.” An exasperated sigh escaped his lips. “Guess it’s cause I don’t jiggle as much as she does.”

“Nope,” grunted Booster after one particularly challenging swing. “No matter the universe,” another grunt, “No matter the timeline. A member of the Batfamily will always outshine all other heroes. Get used to it. According to Skeets, there are already two others active in Bludhaven.”

“Wait, wait, wait,” why wasn’t he grunting? Wasn’t that part of the sport? Booster saw it on TV all the time. “Batfamily? Are you telling me I need to walk upstairs and suggest to Kane that he make a franchise off the Bat logo?”

Before Booster could answer, Skeets vibrated above them. ”Hero down. All Brave and the Bold members are to suit up and head to his aid immediately.”

~~~

Heavy metal music blazed across the square, the frequency of its sound waves cracking roads and shattering glass. It had taken awhile for Mas y Menos to adjust to right vibration to negate the sound effects. First it gave them vertigo, tripping them over each other’s feet. Then the nausea came, embarrassing them on live television. And when they finally figured out how to fight it, the mysterious musician changed tactics, a guitar riff sending a literal wall of sound to smash against them with bone crushing force.

That had left a crater. That had surprised the Machete brothers. Only their connection saved them from severe injury. Yet through their twin bond, Diego felt the inklings of a concussion on Bran. They weren’t used to this kind of fight.

The brothers had been doing good. Fighting the good fight. They saved potential victims from hit and runs. They stopped at least half a dozen purse snatchers a day. There was no counting how many fires they put out or cats they rescued from trees in the span of a week. Such acts had them always on the live feed. Rarely had them in the highlights. The feats could only do so much. Even if they were at the top of the ranks based on raw points, they weren’t the top heroes in the poles. Nowhere near fan favorites.

Apparently if you weren’t wearing red and had a lightning bolt on your chest, people just didn’t care that you could run fast.

Mr. Prez had offered his usual thanks and welcomes at the end of each week but the boys could tell he was disappointed. Infinity Entertainment easily had the most powerful heroes of the bunch. Más y Menos could run circles around the other heroes and beat them senseless before they could blink. Yet… fans loved the mere-humans of the bunch. Those with no powers.

They loved Batwoman.

But that wasn’t enough. Kaldur and Cheshire had more fans too. Where were the Spanish votes? They were even in Texas and still they circled the mid-bottom.

Wavering on his feet, Más angrily tore off the strand of cord the brothers used to bind each other together. It was their conduit to the speed force. That which allowed them, even when not in direct contact, to draw on their full extent of the Speed Force. He pushed his brother away, muscles bulging obscenely across his chest and down his arms. The ultimate steroid. A gorilla with the legs of a monkey.

“<He’s mine.>” growled Diego, every step making his blood burn and body shake. “<Stay out of this.>”

Bran was about to disagree when their manager came through his earpiece and told him to stand down.

The man called himself Helter Skelter after some song or movement. Menos wasn’t quite sure which. His hair was bleached white like a lame eighties rocker. He wore a leather vest showing bare chest with nothing in the way of abs, only ribs. Tattoos ran down the length of his arms. Nothing in particular. All cliché. And of course, he had on the torn jeans and piercings galore. About the only thing impressive was his either magical are very advance guitar.

They had caught him doing enforcer work down by the Boardwalk. Intimidating the businesses for protection money. And the second the super sound waves started when they tried to take him down, they knew this would interrupt the regularly scheduled broadcast. It was their time to shine.

They hadn’t.

Nevertheless, it looked like Mas was about to.

Menos felt his brother gather his power. Besides being able to temporarily accelerate the growth of his muscles, Diego had other powers he could thank their former torturer for. He walked and the sound parted before him. Repulsed. He pushed the sound away, every step taking him forward, every step bringing him a few inches closer to victory.

Helter Skelter tried another vibrant rift. Then another. Menos’ phasing could do nothing to stop it and without his brother’s power to draw on, he felt weakened to the core. Blood gushed from both twin’s noses yet still Mas would not stop. The road shook, their ears bled. Cars were thrown clear across the street, lights through buildings. And the South American hero moved resiliently forward.

There was fear on Helter Skelter’s face. Mas did not care. They were a foot apart. Six inches. One last riff then… nothing.

Mas yanked the guitar from the meta’s grip. He grabbed him by the scruff of the vest. The twins waited, if he gave in, if he surrendered, they’d be obliged to leave him uninjured. The villain’s mouth open to babble yet all the brothers heard was a ringing noise.

Oh well.

Using more restraint thay Menos expected, Más slammed the guitar down across Helter Skelter’s head. It would be worth the fine.

“¡muy bien” cried Bran as he struggled to his feet. Or at least he hoped he did. They had taken down a super villain all by themselves. It was a moment to celebrate.

The gun shot ended any such thoughts.

Through their twin bond, Más felt more than heard his brother’s scream of agony. Menos had collapsed into a ball of tormented pain, his kneecap no longer quite what it once was. A figure stood over him, gun pointed directly at the fallen hero’s head, his free hand holding a sword as it lazily bounced on his shoulder. A half smile, a cocky smirk, pursed his lips, light blond hair blowing in the wind.

To sneak up on a speedster… to have gotten that close, close enough to shoot even with their reduced reflexes should have been impossible. Yet the mysterious figure had at Menos’ expense. Suddenly the reason for someone of Helter Skelter’s ability posing as an enforcer made sense. A distraction. This man wanted to deafen them. To weaken them.

A planner. Skeets had been right.

Despite his brother’s pain, despite their broken connection to the speed force, Más did still possess a measure of enhanced speed. And if he repulsed himself from the ground towards the masked mercenary then…

With the speed of thought, he was propelled forward to save his brother. In that instant, in that blink of an eye, he saw that the man could have killed Menos yet he choose not to. A motion swifter than Más’s own stabbed the sword through his shoulder, impaling him on rubble-strewn street next to his brother. The man twisted the blade for good measure, teasing Más with pain.

‘How was this possible?’ was the only thought to travel through Diego’s brain as his muscles retracted and his adrenalin faded. The twins had been beaten. They were at the mysterious man’s mercy.

~~~

Both men dropped their racquets and left the ball to bounce, rushing out the door, Skeets zooming at their heels. They hadn’t made it seven steps down the hall towards their locker room when Booster’s oldest mechanical friend shook for a second time. ”Second hero down. Suggest caution, probability –“

“It’s started,” gasped Booster in disbelief. It’d only been a few weeks and the bad guys had decided to up the ante.

Beside him, Ted was demanding to know who was injured and how badly on his communicator with those on monitor duty. “Damn it. The twins. The bastard took down the twins in under a minute.”

Booster could only think of a few villains who could pull off such a feat. He wondered if any of his guesses were correct.

“And Cheshire is making the promo-rounds… We’re down by three.” As much as Ted made the Brave and the Bold a competition, as much as everyone believed it was, he had tried to drill into their heads through Wildcat’s training and his own orders, that everyone work together. There were still some egos among the owners and the production staff but for the most part, they worked as a team.

Equals.

A coldness entered his heart. Someone was attacking his teammates. He was going to make them pay. Screw the fines. He had got everyone into this crazy scheme in the first place. . . It was his responsibility.

~~~

The cameras showed Mas y Menos lying at the feet of a strangely clad man. He had sheathed his blade and holstered his gun before pulling something Kate couldn’t quite make out through her display from a pouch. Based on the twins reactions, it looked as if he either injected them with something or drew blood out. Then, the epitome of calm and professionalism, he picked Menos up and tossed the hero across the street with strength bordering on super, far outside of his brother’s reach.

The twins remained unconscious. Unusual given their increased metabolism. You’d need something capable of knocking out an entire herd of elephants to keep them down. Nevertheless, the man continued to take every precaution, hogtying Más with a cord that reminded Kate of her own gear.

Her glider carried her closer to the pier, already destroyed by the twins earlier battle. She hoped to take a route that would surprise the masked villain by circling around the water to come up by the street, going so far as to fly through the spokes of the Ferris wheel. It was roundabout but based on the man’s reactions and the fact the twins’ vitals remained steady, it seemed worth the risk. He was in no hurry to finish them off.

In fact, she could tell he was waiting… waiting for the rest of the heroes.

Kaldur beat her to the scene with a plan similar to her own. He shot out of the water possessing the grace of a dolphin, his waterbearers dragging a funnel of water with him. The man looked up, smirking and eyes twinkling. He launched a grenade at the giant sprout before Kal could slam it into him, showering the battle scene with a flood of water. So quick. So efficient. So… still moving. Kaldur landed in a crouch, summoning a sword and shield of hardwater.

A smile.

The man hit something on his glove and suddenly electricity raced through the rivers Kaldur had caused. It shocked Menos back into painful awareness, his body spasming in pain. It hit Kaldur unexpectedly and through bare feet yet still he stood, seemingly drawing strength from it.

A frown.

Another button push, increasing the voltage. The man slammed his hand to the ground, sending a ripple of watery lightning at the young hero.

Kaldur stood, wincing yet, he found the strength to raise a waterbearer and point it at the man. The sword vanished, replaced with a stream of solidified aquatic bullets. The first dozen hit the masked man in his shoulder then he vanished before the cameras, appearing an instant later to slam Kal’s face to the ground, burying him in the water racing with electricity.

But then Kate was there ready to stop—

The man spun and unholstered his gun in one single, fluid motion. There was not enough time to command her glider to take evasive actions. Batwoman could only take a leap of faith off it as her ride exploded beneath her. A grappling hook flew to increase her velocity, catching on one of the few street lamps still standing. She swung her feet forward, intending to kick the man.

Of course, he dodged and she was ready for that. She let go, matching his flowing speed and happy her suit was insulated against electricity. She rolled to her feet and a trio of concussive batarangs flew at him. The sword was out and blocking. Mistake. The first knocked the blade from his hand, the second just barely dodged and the final hit him right in the middle of his chest. The mini-explosion sent him flying backwards yet he never dropped his gun.

He fired and it was Batwoman’s turn to dodge. She surfed across the flood, prepared to launch her next attack, Out of the side of her vision; she caught Booster and Beetle taking the fallen heroes to safety, trusting her with holding off the masked man until they could get back. In Kate’s mind, she’d have the man bound and gagged before they could.

Clip empty, sword out of reach, the man pulled out a knife to throw at her while flipping to his feet. Too slow. Kate tossed a cryo-pellet directly where he landed, freezing him place. Tanking the knife, not wasting time at being surprised that it somehow pierced her suit, Batwoman was on him before he could free himself. A right hook, a left, kick to the stomach as he tried to protect his face. Another kick to break the ice holding him still. Jab to the throat. Blocked.

He was back in the game, his face a bloody mess beneath the mask. The two circled each other, him pulling out yet another knife, her pulling out two batarangs to use for melee. They clashed, reminding Kate of her days in the military, the exhilaration, and the sheer terror at wondering if she was going to survive.

Both were bleeding profusely from multiple wounds by the time they broke apart. Kate’s arm hung limply at her side, her shoulder out of its socket and her breaths coming out in heavy gasps. For his part, the man remained untired. There was a maniacal look in his eyes, as if he had found a worthy partner yet sorry that he’d still have to murder her.

His mad dash at her became an unexpected jump that brought him into Booster Gold’s waiting fist. His body fell to the slowly draining water, staining it red with his blood. Behind him stood Ted, Beetle-Gun still raised, vigilant in case the man found the strength to stand again.

In the end, Kate lacked the energy to be annoyed at their last minute save. She could only be thankful for Booster’s steadying hand as he kept her from falling.





”You can’t be serious…”