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Post by Stardrifter on Jan 1, 2013 12:43:38 GMT -5
#0 is up!
Normally I find 0 issues to be silly unless you're going back after the fact to do a prequel or something. If it's the beginning then why not start with #1? I decided to make this #0 because it's a stand alone issue that ended up being more Tom's story than Arthur's.
Anyway, let me know what you guys think!
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Post by Drake on Jan 1, 2013 12:59:40 GMT -5
It's very good. I'd also like to say the story worked quite well for a zero issue. There weren't any grammar errors that I found. If I had a complaint, which I really don't, it'd be that it moved just a little slowly. I guess I shouldn't talk, though, because in Shazam, Billy may not get his powers till issue 3. Well, that's another story.
Like I said, absolutely fantastic! I enjoyed this more than even your first DKs issue. 9/10.
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Post by buck on Jan 1, 2013 16:46:39 GMT -5
Great issue glad to see Aquaman in such solid hands.
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Post by liquidsword34 on Jan 1, 2013 20:54:31 GMT -5
Agreed. Although it was an origin story it was quite fast paced which I liked, and the dialogue felt natural and witty ("His brown hair is slicked back with so much grease Arthur wonders if he has to avoid open flame.", for example). Brilliant issue.
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Post by Stardrifter on Jan 9, 2013 22:20:49 GMT -5
Issue #1 is up!
Going forward for a while, you'll be getting 2 issues of Aquaman for every one issue of DK. Just until I get them caught up to each other, and then I'll alternate regularly.
Really interested to see what you guys think. I'll get the Secret Files started once a mod gives me the sub board I requested.
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Post by Stardrifter on Jan 9, 2013 23:50:10 GMT -5
SF updated. As always, I suggest you read the issues posted before checking the SF. There will be spoilers.
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Post by DiscipleofBob on Jan 10, 2013 10:43:51 GMT -5
Interesting so far. It has a very Smallville feel to it thus far.
If there were any grammar errors, none really stood out to me, but then again I don't really take notice unless I'm looking specifically for errors or they interrupt the flow of the story.
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Post by Ultimate Silentking on Jan 11, 2013 19:01:00 GMT -5
Finally read issue 0. Wow some parts felt cliched, you made it work. As in, it benefited the story instead of ruining it. I also enjoyed the interaction between Thomas and Arthur. Thomas is a very likable character as well as Arthur. I think the pace of the story was perfect. Nothing else I can say really. 9.5/10 Now to read issue 1.
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Post by Drake on Jan 12, 2013 0:06:28 GMT -5
Very, very good. I agree with Disciple that it feels very Smallville-ish, and it works. Other than the occasional grammar error, my one problem with this issue is that Arthur seems a little...judgmental. He's stopping Jenna and scolding her for drinking, when he's doing the same without a care in the world. It's just...weird. Rude. If you're playing up Arthur as the somewhat smug king-type, then I understand, but it feels odd that he would judge Jenna for drinking when he did the same.
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Post by Stardrifter on Jan 12, 2013 0:12:50 GMT -5
He wasn't being judgmental. It's made clear(I thought) that she doesn't like the beer at all. She was drinking it to try and fit in. When he finally takes it and gets her a soda, she doesn't object.
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Post by Drake on Jan 12, 2013 1:41:25 GMT -5
Yes, but it's still...odd. Well, maybe odd isn't the right word, but it is a little bit haughty. Don't you think the girl could have gotten her own drink, and thrown out the beer if she wanted to? It doesn't really matter. The chapter was over all very good. I very much look forward to more. 8.75/10. .25 for the occasional large grammar error.
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Post by liquidsword34 on Jan 12, 2013 9:04:44 GMT -5
I didn't really notice many grammar/spelling errors to be honest, and I liked the issue overall.
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Post by jackalope on Jan 21, 2013 7:55:39 GMT -5
Alright, read #0 & 1. Both good.
#0 was a nice introduction to Arthur and his father. It was a neat idea making him telepathic- I know he normally is with animals, but this is an interesting addition. Liked, what I'm guessing were, his semi-divine origins.
#1 had a good amount of action balanced with the introduction to the trio. The female best-friend was nice. The origin of whatever Dr Jones has become was suitably creepy.
Good work.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Jan 27, 2013 17:58:35 GMT -5
Just read the zero issue (will read #1 in a bit). Good intro, I liked the tone of the story and Thomas' voice rang true. Sean reminded me a lot of a kid I knew when I lived in Maine for a couple of years, must be something in the Downeast air, though I was much farther north and inland than the Curry lighthouse.
Making Arthur a full-blown telepath is a significant change to the character. It certainly would change the dynamic to a traditional JLA with Martian Manhunter as a member as the two would have redundant powers. I am interested to see how that plays out, as it changes the essential nature of the character.
As always, well written, keep up the good work.
-M
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Post by Stardrifter on Jan 27, 2013 20:05:16 GMT -5
It is a change that's reason will be explained in time. Its not arbitrary. And you want to talk redundancy? I'm looking at you Superman, MM, WW, and Flash.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 27, 2013 21:03:59 GMT -5
Read #1...
as for the nits a few typos here and there (lack of apostrophes for possessives, an ere instead of err, etc.) but they did not stand in the way of the story.
As for the beer thing, many people do things to try to fit in and won't stop on their own accord even if they know they should, sometimes a friend has to step up and force them to do the right thing, the thing they know they should be doing anyways. It may seem harsh or presumptuous, but it also plays well if Arthur has a history of looking out for Jenna as the rest of the story implies. Sometimes when you are in the middle of a situation you lack the perspective to see it for what it is, or what the effects of your actions will be. Jenna obviously demonstrates she is smart, but lacks good judgment where Arthur is concerned if she is following him to Metropolis rather than following her other dreams. If Arthur knows this is her pattern of behavior (and being telepathic, it is a good bet he does, but just being an observant friend would reveal it too), he has likely fallen into a pattern of countering such behavior even without realizing it, because he cares for her. Not the healthiest of relationship dynamics, but one that is not uncommon.
As for the issue itself, I liked it, but being a first issue I think I wanted more of a glimpse of the direction of the series. However that is bias and preference. I always dread origin stories and find them to be slow and often the least interesting story that features the character when discussing actual published comics, and I usually want the origin story to be over to get to actual stuff the character does rather than having the origin be a slow burn. It is rare that the origin is captivating and has enough drama and tension for my tastes to carry a long-form story. It's a well written issue, and well done, but it's an origin story and that is a mark against it for me. (Just for context, I think most super-hero movies should get the origin done in the opening credit sequence and get on to tell a more interesting story with the character, so its not limited to my reading here). There are exceptions, but those origin stories that do success long term are more about the events of the heroes journey than the circumstances of the origin itself-i.e. they are telling a story within the context of the origin, not telling an origin story. I will say, there looks to be the potential for that here, but there was not enough to tell for certain. I look forward to seeing what the next few issues bring to the table.
-M
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Post by buck on Jan 28, 2013 19:26:27 GMT -5
Solid second issue. The beer thing didn't bother me at all actually. The Dr. Jones scene was very well written in the brief moments we had Francine and Mr. Jones around for we got a feel for who they were so good job there.
Keep up the good work.
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Post by DiscipleofBob on Feb 1, 2013 11:52:13 GMT -5
It is a change that's reason will be explained in time. Its not arbitrary. And you want to talk redundancy? I'm looking at you Superman, MM, WW, and Flash. Hey, Wonder Woman isn't redundant! She has a rope! AND BRACELETS! Anyway, second issue is solid. Wish there was more for me to comment on, but I can't find much wrong with it. The changes to Aquaman are interesting, the teenager dynamic is done well, and the scientist guy is sufficiently creepy. I'm fine with the full-blown telepathy thing. It makes more sense than just being fish-specific. Besides the Manhunter, there aren't enough telepaths in the DCU. But be careful, telepathy is often one of those powers that either makes every encounter too easy, or makes the audience wonder why telepathy isn't used to solve every encounter.
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Post by Stardrifter on Feb 1, 2013 13:23:50 GMT -5
It hasn't been made clear yet, it will be next issue, but I would point out that he's limited to reading and sending thoughts. Nothing more.
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jay
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Post by jay on Feb 8, 2013 15:16:07 GMT -5
Read all the issues and I gotta say I love what you are doing here with Aquaman. As for the telepath thing it really does make sense that he would have full blown telepath powers to me. If you think about it Aquaman and Martian Manhunter have always been a bit confrontational in their relationship to a degree. With them both being telepaths they can have a sort of competition element to each other, plus if either of them go down the team isn't down a telepath. It makes sense to me, and with you giving him a limitation that could lead to some interesting explanations for power interactions. Again I'm liking your cast and how they are reacting to each other right now and I think the story is doing great pacing wise.
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